


Christmas Catastrophes

by emynn (orphan_account)



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Christmas, Established Relationship, Humor, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-12-06
Updated: 2013-12-06
Packaged: 2018-01-03 15:18:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 678
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1072009
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/emynn
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Oh dear, holiday plans are going all awry. What ever will Severus and Harry do?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Christmas Catastrophes

**Author's Note:**

> Written for Adventdrabble's Prompt 5: Santa Claus(es)/Christmas storm

“Severus, are you just about ready?” Harry called out, tucking away the last of the Christmas presents into an oversized sack. He could shrink them, of course, but he always loved entering the Burrow with a bagful of gifts slung over his shoulder, just like a younger, clean-shaven Santa Claus.

“I’m afraid there’s been a change of plans,” Severus answered.

Harry bounded down the stairs. “What are you talking about? Did Molly Floo to change the time?”

“Yes, about that,” Severus said, a forlorn look upon his face. “It appears I neglected to pay the Floo tax this month. Ours has been disconnected.”

“Our – you’ve got to be kidding me,” Harry said. “You always pay our bills the second they come in. I barely even have a chance to look at them.”

“I must have missed it with all the holiday chaos,” Severus said. “I’ll send the payment immediately, of course, but I fear that since the Ministry is on holiday, we won’t have access to our Floo until the new year.”

Harry frowned. He wasn’t sure what was more disconcerting: that Severus forgot to pay the tax, or that he didn’t sound like he was all that put out by the fact. Both were tremendously out of character.

“Well, that’s all right,” Harry said. “Might be a good day for flying anyway.” He laughed. “Can you imagine? The two of us could come flying in with sacks full of presents over our shoulders. _Two_ Santa Clauses. The kids will love it.”

“Have you looked outside?” Severus asked, nodding towards the window. “It’s a blizzard.”

Harry glanced outside. Sure enough, Severus was right. With the way the snow was coming down, they would never be able to stay on their brooms for more than a few minutes, let alone fly all the way to the Burrow.

“Damn,” Harry muttered. “Apparating it is, then.”

“Oh, my,” Severus said, holding a hand up to his forehead. “I do believe I’m feeling faint. Feverish, as well. I have to say, I’m nervous about Apparating. My head is in such a fog I fear I may Splinch myself.”

Harry narrowed his eyes. “You planned all of this, didn’t you? I knew there was no way you could forget to pay a bill.”

“Harry, I’m hurt,” Severus said. “Do you honestly believe I would lie to my lover about why we cannot access our Floo, and then pretend to be ill simply to avoid having to leave our nice, warm house where we have a very comfortable bed that’s just begging to be shagged in, in order to spend the day with thirty screaming redheads gorging themselves on roast goose in between dodging prank wands?”

Harry raised a brow. 

Severus raised one back.

Harry sighed. “Fine. We’ll stay in. But you’re the one telling Molly.”

“How am I supposed to do that?” Severus asked. “Did you not hear me say the Floo was disconnected?”

“Fortunately, we have several owls at our disposal,” Harry said.

“That you’d risk sending out into a blizzard?”

“I’m willing to wager it’s just a dusting of snow and you charmed the windows to make it look like a storm,” Harry said, crossing his arms.

Severus remained silent. 

“If we don’t say anything, she’ll just show up at our front door.”

“Not if I tack a ‘Quarantine’ sign on our front gate.”

“Then she’d only come back with soup,” Harry said, and handed Severus a quill and parchment. “Come on, Severus. You want to get us out of it, you do the dirty work.”

“Fine,” Severus said, snatching the items. “The things I do just to give you a good fuck. I thought living together was supposed to make getting you into bed easier.”

Harry snorted. “You’re lucky Santa already delivered his presents. That stunt would have put you on his naughty list.”

“Ho bloody ho,” Severus said. With one last scribble, he rolled up the parchment. “There, done. _Now_ may I please suck your cock?”

Harry grinned and took Severus in his arms. “I thought you’d never ask.”


End file.
